A thank you.

To those following my blog and those reading along, I sincerely appreciate the support you’ve shown me since I began writing.  It wasn’t easy and still isn’t to share some of my ideas and thoughts.  Writing publicly is daunting.  Not only does writing in the open push me to accept myself, it challenges me to continue to extend that patience to myself, regardless of what people think of me after they’ve read some of my work.  Writing places me in nearly daily internal confrontation, causing me to truly consider whether certain stories I’ve held back are to protect myself or to protect others, and in either case, is that protection merited.  Writing tests my ability to control my emotions and separate how I’m feeling with what I’d really like to say, or to at least be honest and acknowledge that I might be thinking unclearly because my passion is unchecked.  A long time ago, I was hurt when someone told me something like, “You’re so angry, I can’t hear the good you’re saying.”  I look back on this moment now and can see the wisdom in those words, though I might reword it slightly.  Anger is natural and it happens.  I even offer that we should be angrier more often about certain things in life.  I wouldn’t have started with the anger in that gentle admonishment, but with the latter portion.  All I heard was that I was angry and I was distraught that I was being reprimanded for being angry, especially since my feelings were reasonable.  I completely missed that the person said that I was saying something good.  If my anger was so loud that those good ideas were harder to hear and comprehend, I needed to do better.  I did need to consider how I was letting that anger out and to whom I was directing that anger at.  Even though my anger was deserving, it was important for me to learn that the good I was saying had to be bigger than the anger I was feeling, otherwise, it was only anger people would see.  Thank you for being patient while I learn how to build this site, how to have menus, and how to make it easier to use.  Thank you for holding on when days go by between posts as I sort through different feelings and take time to choose carefully what words I take from rough draft to finally sharing.