Prince of Darkness

Ironically, one of the songs that taught me much about myself as a child of God was by Indigo Girls and considered corrupt by some in my fundamental church growing up, though not in my home thankfully.  In addition to Ray and Saliers creating secular work that was arguably more religiously compelling than much contemporary Christian music of the time, they were artists who allowed themselves to live more genuinely than most of the women I remember encountering as a young girl.  I believe they had and have something precious: spiritual freedom.  The women around me may have believed they had it, and maybe they did, but it wasn’t what I perceived when I looked to them for guidance.  It felt like they didn’t have the opportunity to exist untethered, free to be tied only to themselves and God.  Freely following God requires that you don’t reject yourself.  If we’re made in God’s image, rejecting ourselves is a form of rejecting God.  When a church of people decides who is made in the image of God and who is not, moments to thrive as you were created cease to exist and self-hatred begins and festers.  Not only is Prince of Darkness an excellent song with beautiful harmony and relatable lyrics that resonate thirty years later, it helped me begin and continue to embrace my own autonomy.  My place is of the sun and when I deny myself and who I really am inside, I am living in the dark and away from the independence I’m given as a child of God.  When I sing along to this song now, I sing with an abandon I’m not sure I’ve ever had before.  I was not born to be a pawn.  I was born to be who I am.